20 April, 2006

Virginity is stupid

There's been a lot of talk about "women's purity" - from the Duke University rape indictments, to abstinence education, to purity balls(which have to be the stupidest things the Queen has ever heard of). All of these have to do with the sacred place of virginity, which is really, really stupid.
Virginity used to matter because of property issues, in the English Common Law, the eldest son of the patriarch inherited property and it was important that the first son was the son of the patriarch and not of the hot, muscular stable lad. Now, with the decline in the importance of real property, equality in property laws and the ease of property transfers and estate planning, these issues no longer arise.

Virginity all too often measures female worth. A stripper that gets raped is viewed as suspect because she's had sex, while the rape of a nice(i.e. white & Christian) girl is viewed as a tragedy. It is not just unjust, it makes no sense. If you are going to measure worth by a set of criteria, virginity is the most imbecillic trait to pick.
Being a virgin does not improve your job performance.
Being a virgin has no effect on a person's competence in doing everyday tasks
Being a virgin doesn't give any positive character traits
Being a virgin doesn't give a person the tools they need to have a successful relationship
Being a virgin has absolutely nothing to do with who a person is or what they can accomplish
and most importantly,
Being a virgin will not help anyone who is trying to fight of a horde of mutated sea urchins armed with large boxed of blueberries while humming the William Tell Overture.

It is of course easy to say that virginity until marriage will solve all our social ills. It is also easy to say that putting a yellow magnet on your gas-guzzler will solve the Iraq war. It is easy to say that bowing down to corporate interests to allow guest worker visas, so companies can continue to pay indecent wages to immigrant workers, will improve the lives of immigrants. It is easy to say that waving a giant pair of boxer shorts with comical designs will scare the mutated sea urchins from their blueberry flavoured attacks. It is easy to say a lot of things, to come up with nice sounding solutions but these solutions don't work. Being a good husband or wife is more than having an intact hymen or unused dick - it is knowing how to communicate, respecting your spouse, being honest, open, and loving. You can wait and wait for the magic moment, to have happily-ever-after end in divorce.

That is, of course, in some cases virginity is not good. Virginity + "purity" propaganda is setting up young people for a whole lot of disillusionment. Combine abstinence education with teenage hormones and you get young people engaging in risky and unprotected sexual contact. Forget the post 9/11 world - we live in AIDS world, and anyone teaching kids to avoid using things that have been proven to reduce the virus should be prosecuted for criminally negligent homicide. Yes, throw all the abstinence fucks in - they are part of the reason why kids are getting infected with AIDS and other STIs, why kids have unwanted pregnancies and abortions.

The fathers at these purity balls are nitwits, morons and imbeciles. Fuck the religious tradition, seriously. If they want their daughters to be successful, make them promise to finish school, make them promise to finish university, make them promise to drive safely - these things will matter to whether a child succeeds in life or not. If they want their daughters to be successful wives & mothers, then they can teach them to cook, to babysit, they can spend time communicating with their daughters, to give them respect - so when or if the girls get married or get in relationships, they'll have the actual skills to be successful. By focusing on their daughters' "purity" they go for the easy option - the easy option that accomplishes absolutely nothing and that is stupid.

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